Kidney Stones

Dear Universe....

I acknowledge that I like to do things in my life with a little dramatic flair.
I acknowledge that I (either conciously or subconciously) create my life story before living it.
I DO NOT acknowledge that every event must be surrounded with a story I will share with others until the day that I die.

So remember how I said that I was up on Thursday night from 3:30 until 7:00 with labor pains? Well, I went to bed early on Friday night to then bolt out of bed in pain at 10:30. I was having a seizing feeling on my left side that would not relax. Nothing would release the pain.. walking... heat.... massage... nothing. At about 11:00, I call my sister who says, "Call the doctor". A response I hate to hear from both her and my mother. So Mike calls the doctor because by now I can't speak. She says, come in to the hospital so that they can put me on a monitor. I hate this even more, because 9 out of 10 times you get there and they just stare at you and send you home. Since Max is already asleep we need someone to come stay with him until one of my family can get there to take him back to Alvin (Mom and everyone was over there because Kameron's big birthday bash was the next day). I call Todd & Allison because they are closest in proximity, but Allison was out and Todd was with Noah alone. I then think... Uncle TJ. Perhaps on some strange luck, Travis did not go out this Friday night and he is just sitting up watching TV. No such luck... but Na Na Linda was awake and she came to the rescue.
Now we are on the way to the hospital....Mike's good and loving husband response is to keep a calm head and drive to the hospital obeying every rule. Becky's painful and demon response was to scream at him that he is allowed to break the rules this time, I will explian to the nice officer how it feels to have a knife twisted in your back for an hour & a half straight.
We arrive at the hospital and normally they send you to their version of the ER whci is called the treatment room, but this time they send me to Labor & Delivery. This is my 1st "Oh shit moment"! We get upstairs, walk through the big doors, and I walk a few feet to a housekeeping cart where I proceed to vomit violently. I hear a nurse walk up beside me and say, " You must be Ms. Randall!" She tells me that my room is a few doors down and did I need a wheelchair... yeah like the last 15 feet I am gonna need a wheelchair.... no thanks I think I will just continue to walk and vomit while pushing this housekeeping cart!
I get into the room and they quickly get me into the bed to put me on the monitors. Here comes the 2nd "oh shit" moment of the night. The nurse is searching my belly for a heartbeat and cannot find one. As time progresses it gets more and more frantic, "Ms. Randall when is the last time you felt the baby move... Ms. Randall has the baby moved in the last hour...." This is when a cold hard reality has hit me... I have no idea the last time the baby moved. Did the baby die and my body is just having a reaction to it? Finally... thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa... the shear relief masks the pain for a while.
They start the IV, have me sign tons of paper that looked nothing like my signature and monitor me for awile before the doctor says... "I think you might have kidney stones". The give me a shot of anti-nausa medicine and a shot of demoral which did not stop the pain, but sure knocked my ass out so that I could not feel it!
I slept so hard that I did not even feel them monitoring me all night. I woke up around 6:30 and the pain was gone. This utter joy was soon shattered by the 3rd and final "oh shit" moment of the night's events. Dr. Elizabth Swaim walks in the door... yes, ladies and gents... the witch doctor who kept me in a potossin induced labor for 18 hours with MAX. The skanky whore who refused to give me an epidural beacuse it would only slow the process. She proceeds to tell me that she doesn't think it is kidney stones, but she will agree to the ultrasound anyway... what a whore!!!
Well the whore was wrong... the ultra sound showed that yes it was a kidney stone. Unfortunately, it is very painful and there is not a damn thing thay can do about it but wait until it passes...
Good news... baby is fine ... bad news.... no stone yet.. or at least i don't think so... my mom says I may get lucky and it will dissolve once in the bladder and I will not feel it come out... I will keep you posted!