Monday, April 04, 2005

It's really okay...

I am not sure if I am more sensitive to recent topics that have been spread all over the media or if everyone feels the deep sadness and peace that has come over me... I am referring to the recent deaths of the Pope and Terry Schaivo. I do not wish to politicize or give my opinion on the right and wrongs of either of these situations, just share part of a wonderful experience that has been very difficult to share.
I believe that when it is your time to go, you get the choice. I believe that there is a conversation between you and God, and when it is time... it's just time. I used to be very scared of death, couldn't even watch movies or TV that mad fun of people dying because the concept of being here one minute and gone the next terrified me. That was until my father gave me a wonderful gift. He allowed my mother, my sister and I the honor to be in his presence when it was his time to go. Watching someone die is probably the hardest yet most fulfilling experience.
There comes a time when you find peace with the fact that the end is near. We found this peace through my father. Every step of this last journey, he led the way. He told us the end was near... his entire demeanor changed. You could see him slipping in between Heaven and here. I saw him talking to people in the room that were not visible to our eyes. Though the sadness was overwhelming, I found peace and strength in praying for his release. When the moment came, he opened his eyes and started releasing his last breaths. He gave us the time to get on his bed, hold him and tell him it was okay to let go and how much we loved him. Once he was gone, there was this incredible peace. Even in the utter sadness, at the core there is peace.
Thank you...
Thank you, Dad, for allowing me to witness the beautiful gift of your last moments here...
Thank you, Pope John Paul, for facing your death with courage and strength and conviction in your faith that this was not just the end of this journey, but the beginning of a new one...
Thank you, Terry, for allowing your struggle to be an example to others of the importance of talking about death, not fearing it, and realizing that we must be clear with all of our loved ones concerning the final moments of our lives.

5 comments:

Eyes said...

March 27th of last year, we went to visit my husband's grandma who was 93 and still independent - and healthy. We planned to spend the day with her. Just sadly, she died while in mid-conversation with us just after we got back from lunch. I had never witnessed death before.

The way she died was a gift to me too. It was QUICK, painless and over in an instant. There was incredible peace...and I don't believe in God.

J said...

I think God is trying to tell us to listen and pay attention. We are passing life by, us americans who trust that everything will always be okay. I too am feeling the sadness.

VILLAGE IDIOT said...

you know me,

Becky said...

I agree in that those of us who have been through watching someone deteroriate and pass on have a different perspective on this whole issue.

I think that when my step-dad passed away last Fall, I truly believe that he chose his time to go, as the family had all arrived and he didn't want to be a burden to us, since he could no longer do anything for himself. That is one reason why I'm skeptical to think that Terry Schiavo was lucid in that I would think that if she had been, she would've shut herself down as well.

Excellent post and very touching.

Bud said...

You put that so well without politicizing it, Becky. Thanks for that. My Dad died in my arms, too. So I know of what you speak. Thanks also for the B-day wishes. I'll certainly be back.