Monday, November 09, 2009

Dear Spam,

I hate you.

I mean I really really hate you.

I mean there is cold dark place in hell for you to stand on your head in a pile of s&%$ kind of hate.

As far as I am concerned, you are punishable by jail because of the constant harassment.

I do not wish to increase my penis size.
I do not care to buy prescription drugs from Canada.
I have no need for Viagra 75% off.
I will not be buying CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP Rolex's for Christmas.
You cannot fool me into clicking HERE to update my account info for the Bank of Tanzania, Facebook, or a returned IRS Tax return.
I do not wish to buy a degree in any field.
We did not chat online and get interrupted, or whatever.
I do not wish to buy a foreign bride, look at naked women, or men dressed as women, or barely legal teens, etc, etc, etc.
I know you are not giving away free laptops.
I know your software is illegal.
And what the hell does "ugfhgb jidlh jhlhoyehfabb hahorbadf jrouerqhe ..." mean anyway and who in their right mind would press the underlined link in an email like that anyway?!?!?!

You are all a*^%*%oles......all of you. I am so tired of spending a good chunk of my day going line by line deleting you and trying to sort your bulls&*%$ from actual important business emails. I can't even use anti-spam programs because we are a medical industry business so what I would use to block you could potentially block important business emails. I cannot change my email accounts because these are published emails and it would only be a matter of time before I am sold on another phishing list.

Bite me.... spam... you can bite me... if I don't bite you first.

Best Regards,
Bitch@pissedoff.com

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