A funny thing happened on the way to the Walgreen's....

Let me start this post with a very clear warning that this is one of those "TOO MUCH INFORMTION" posts.... so if ya can't take the heat... get out of my kitchen now before your eyes burst into flames reading the following story....








Now... momma decided last night that she needed some luvin....it had been a while because we have been out of our chosen form of controlling the amount of clones I create of my husband.... this has always been my husband's job.... it is his responsibility to make sure we are not out and to replace them when we are, but it has slipped both of our minds (and desire) lately....
He was already getting ready for bed, so he told me that if I wanted it, I had to go to Walgreen's to get it.....(big huge smile on his face)....so after some whiny delay, I finally psyche myself up enough to go....
"Is there anything else that we need so it isn't so obvious?"
(Again... big smile from him because he knows how much this is killing me....)
I get in the car and try to convince myself what a dork I am being about this... I am clearly an adult, married and performing an action accepted event by even the most strict religions....I even have proof that this event has occured at least twice in the form of big red and little red....but no one knows an estimated time and date these events occurred like the total strangers at Walgreen's could assume....
So I walk into the store and pick up a basket. I start to walk up and down the aisles looking very casual and picking up anything that we might possibly need in the next 3 months or in the eent that a natural disaster should sneek up on us. I get to the aisle that has the main item on my mental shopping list and realize how very little I know about this household item that has kept me out of a double wide trailer with 16 kids. I have no clue which one to get, my pleasure, his pleasure, spermicidal or heated lubricant, blah blah blah blah.... I just grab one and continue my stroll through the store stocking up on our bomb shelter necessities. I am satisfied with the amount of shampoo, pediacare, orange juice, and diet coke to hide my teenage embarrassment, so I head to the check out... manned by 2 MALE teenage checkers....Oh God help me.... I know you are laughing your ass off right now up there, but give me a break. I walk up to one of them, drop the basket on the counter and immediately turn my entire focus to swiping my debit card and reading every instruction very intently as if I had never read whether or not I wanted cash back before and what denominations I had to chose from. I then hear him say,
"I think these are on sale"
Referring to the Diet cokes I answer "Yeah, but they are 3 for 9.99 and I only want one"
Choking and stuttering he starts to chuckle and say say, " No I mean... uhm... well the other thing...."
I HAD TO PICK THE ONE ON SALE!!!
So here he is trying to keep himself from laughing and thumbing through the Walgreen's ad to make sure that the one I have chosen are in fact on sale....
"Yep, right here....."
He then takes $5.99 of the main price and tries not to make eye contact with me as I am literally on the verge if crying from laughter at how this trip to Walgreen's has turned out.

.... I walk into the door at home to Michael saying, "You should have taken your phone with you... squirt is up!"
I walk into our bed to find our 1 yr old wimpering with a 102 temp.....
... at least we used the Pediacare I bought .....