Tuesday, December 14, 2004

The New Mommy of Two

Hello from the other side....

I feel like I have been sucked through some sort of black hole that placed the last 6 days in limbo while the universe re-arranged the details of my new life.

From the moment we left the Smith's house after dropping Max off, I felt like I got onto a new ride at Disney World and I wasn't really sure what to expect. I knew it was gonna be big and leave a huge impression on me for the rest of my life, but other than that I just had to get on and enjoy the ride. Others had been on the ride before and tried to tell me all about it, but you never really know until you get on for yourself.

I do not remember a lot of the details because it all runs together and overwhelms me, but I do remember some frozen moments, like pictures, that I hope I never forget.

My nurse Liz: Loved her from the moment I turned the corner into my waiting area. Crazy, funny, full of energy. She was with me from the prep, thru surgery, recovery and wheeled me up to my room. They was something amazingly calming about having the same person through the whole process. I didn't have to tell the same story over and over again. She knew when I was hurting before I had to tell her. Truly an Angel who walked into my life, held my hand with unconditional support, then sent me on my path to continue the journey. God Bless Her!

Ben's 1st cry: Tears of joy! It was a voice I had never heard before but knew instantly. As they were cleaning him up, they were concerned that he was grunting for air because he was 2 weeks early, but my mother's instinct said, "Sure, go ahead and look at him, but he is perfect, he just told me so!"

Max meeting Ben: Max was so wired from his exciting day with NaNa Linda, Grandpa Jim, Uncle Pablo, Uncle TJ and Kim (I cannot thank them enough for making this so special for him). Everyone was in the room and he thought it was a party. Finally the moment... Ben was coming... everyone left the room so that we could have a family moment. Mike took Max out into the hall with everyone to see Ben and I heard gushes of joy coming from everyone when Ben had arrived... then Max comes back into the room with this look like... "You are never gonna believe what I just saw!" The nurse gave me Ben and instantly Max wanted on the bed to kiss and love on Ben. He was just so excited to see him and luckily that feeling has not worn off yet!

Bonding with Ben: Ben and I had a lot of alone time together, which was wonderful. Breast feeding has come so naturally with him. He latched right on the first time as if we had done this a thousand times before. Whenever he came back from the nursery, he would first pull back from me, look around, smell the air, then you could see the conscious thought of, "Yes... this is where I want to be, where I am supposed to be... thank you nurse lady.. you can leave!" and chomp right on my breast!

There is so much more... and I am sure I will share much more.. but one thing about being a new mom is that you do not need a clock anymore... my aching breasts are telling me that it is almost time for Ben to wake up for his dinner!

A million thanks to Emily for keeping the blog updated and for posting all the pictures!

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